And The Cameras Go
by Tarafina
Summary: "I was just going to have a pottery wheel installed in my shop, make my own kiln, have JARVIS dim the lights, put on Unchained Melody in true, cheesy fashion…" Tony nodded. "And I'll sit still if you're willing to do most of the work…"


**Title**: And The Cameras Go (Click, Click, Click, Flash)  
**Category**: Thor/Avengers  
**Genre**: Humor/Romance  
**Ship**: Tony/Darcy  
**Rating**: PG-13  
**Prompt**: Paparazzi by anoymous  
**Word** **Count**: 714  
**Summary**: "I was just going to have a pottery wheel installed in my shop, make my own kiln, have JARVIS dim the lights, put on Unchained Melody in true, cheesy fashion…" Tony nodded. "And I'll sit still if you're willing to do most of the work…"

_**And The Cameras Go (Click, Click, Click, Flash)**_  
-1/1-

"I don't remember signing up for this," Darcy complained, slinking lower in her seat as paparazzi gathered around the car, cameras flashing, one after the other, trying desperately to snap a picture of Tony Stark and his new girlfriend. Or, in their eyes, his latest fling.

"It was _definitely _in the agreement," Tony said, mugging happily. "In between amazing sex on every available surface and unlimited free Iron Man merchandise," he clarified.

She rolled her eyes. "Hey, I asked for unlimited iTunes, not Iron Man merch…" She snorted. "I don't really feel like playing with plastic rip off's when I've got the real thing, thanks."

"First, on the grounds that it's an Apple product, I chose to completely disregard it." His eyes widened, brows hiked. "Also, I still think you should be more excited about the line of Iron Man sex toys coming out…"

"And I think you should stop lending your penis to things… Sex toys, oversized towers, where does it end?"

"What about that pottery class I signed us up for? I thought we'd have a Ghost moment and then recreate my glory in ceramic form," he countered.

Darcy shook her head, grinning. "You really think you'll sit still long enough for a pottery class?"

"Well… I was just going to have a pottery wheel installed in my shop, make my own kiln, have JARVIS dim the lights, put on Unchained Melody in true, cheesy fashion…" He nodded. "And I'll sit still if you're willing to do most of the work…" He offered a suggestive smirk.

She tipped her head thoughtfully. "Remind me again why I'm dating you?"

His brow furrowed. "Daddy issues?"

"Sadly, I don't even have that to fall back on…" she sighed faux-mournfully.

"Huh." He nodded. "Must be my amazing charm, endless genius, and that I occasionally worship you…"

"Hmm, good point." She sat up a little straighter in her chair. "All right…" She readjusted her dress. "How do the girls look?" she asked.

His gaze fell to her chest and he hummed. "Magnificent."

"Awesome." She reached for the door handle. "Look, I promise I won't pull a Britney and clock anyone with an umbrella… But only if you do too."

"No, absolutely not. I can't agree to that," he replied, straight-faced.

Her eyes narrowed as she offered, "I will bring whipped cream to bed if you promise to be on your best behavior…"

He grinned. "You'll bring it anyway."

She frowned. "You're right… I have no idea how to punish you then…"

His eyes turned off. "I have a great idea."

Snorting, she said, "If you think it's great, it's not a punishment."

He smirked wickedly.

"I'm getting out of this car and having dinner… Be a gentleman and make sure these people don't swarm and trample me."

"See, this is why I said I should bring the suit," he reminded.

"You needed some time away from your suit. You're too attached!" she said, pointing at him sternly. "I'm serious, Tony, if you wear the suit to bed one more time…"

He shrugged. "Hey, it didn't get in the way of _anything_."

"Metal is cold and not comfortable… We are not having suit-sex again." Her eyes widened for emphasis. "And since you're coming out with a sex toy that's actual size, it's gonna make turning down suit-sex a _whole_ lot easier," she reminded, before shoving the door open and climbing out.

Tony pouted. "You ruin good things, Lewis…" He pushed his own door open though and climbed out, flashing a grin for the collected paparazzi before circling his car, hand finding the small of her back as he leaned down to say into her ear, "I'll make it up to you…" He bit her earlobe teasingly. "_All_ of it."

Darcy's arm slid around his waist as she leaned into him while they started for the restaurant, and he knew he was forgiven. Forgetting for a moment that there were cameras everywhere, he pressed his smiling face against her hair and nuzzled her ear with his nose. She looked up at him from the corner of her eyes and smiled.

"You're getting soft, Stark."

"Actually, the _opposite_," he said, grinning as he slid his hand down to squeeze her ass.

The flash of cameras behind them grew exponentially.

[**End**.]


End file.
